Finding My Way

College has been an eye- opening experience that has given me a whole fresh perspective in the world. High school is politics. In college I have freedom to walk out of the thorny confinement of the nest, stretch my wings, and fly freely without a teacher interrogating me why my ID is not hanging on my chest. The ID was in my hand and some woman who thinks she is God is telling me how I deserve a detention. I am a student not a dangerous Juvenile Delinquent. I deserve respect. Not to wear an ID tag and to be funneled down the hallway like cattle going through the chute. Social hierarchy in school, student= inferior with intelligence equivalent to a herd of Angus. ID person= "God" feel the wrath if slave does rebel. I felt like a domesticated submissive dog cowering to its higher member of society. I feel now I have an identity in college. It was time for change.
In college, I am the smart kid of the class who is pulling A's out of her pocket it seems. To the amateur's eyes it looks as though I can wink and THE Scarlet letter will just appear on my papers. I earn those A's, and it takes discipline in order for my paper to wear that Scarlet Letter with pride. Hester would sure be proud of me for my adherence to that letter. I even have a Beta named Scarlet... but I am digressing. I earn my 12/10's by diligence and by discipline. I am a college student. I can earn the status I wanted to gain in high school... NOW.
I learned that in college I can be a lover. I am a lover of knowledge, and a lover of Literature. I can indulge myself in the rich barbaric texts of skulls and chains, charnel houses, and castles. I am a lover of Gothic texts that make the blood curdle and clot and the tendons twist and rot. I am a lover of fiction, the doors that open to many a path waiting for me to choose my way. I cannot wait to fulfill my desire of fulfilling the mind. College has taught me that Literature is a study of history in its fullest.
College has taught me how to analyze literature through the schools of Literary Criticism. Move away New Criticism, your evil myopic perspectives are old and crippled. So simple minded it is to analyze text of figurative language without any mind to author or time period. Puh to you. Hello Feminist Criticism, Marxist Criticism, Psychoanalytical Criticism, and Cultural Criticism. These schools look at more than an author's way of creatively communicating... these critical schools help look at WHY the author chose to write the symbols and why they are writing about the themes they choose. College is the time to start looking deeper at prose, not just what lies on the surface.
So what if I am the SMART KID? Frankly, that is how God made me, and I abide by HIS judgment. Every now and then, it is ok to earn a letter like Hester Prynn. Nowadays, a Scarlet Letter is worth its weight in gold. -- I am not advocating any adultery here-- or to those who think I am... go right on ahead. No one is stopping you, this is college for goodness sakes. Thats what college kids do. Society these days is crumbling down like the Wall of Jericho. It is too late beyond repair. Fortunately, I am the wallflower of my generation who abstains from the college students hoo ha and poppycock. I sit inside my little room tapping away so I can proudly wear the letter A.